Cupcake bakeries ~ is taking over the world and your bank balance not going hand-in-hand?

I love baking (obviously) even though I don't have that much time to do it nowadays.

Anyway, who in the baking world does not know of the cupcake phenomenon? Or is it a cupcake fad? Personally, I can't see it much as a fad because cupcakes to me translate as "portion control" for the sweets lovers. Besides, you can pick many different flavours in small portions rather than one cake with one flavour.

However, it scares me to read that the famous US cupcake bakery Crumbs made only $34,400 profit in the latest quarter after a turnover of $9.7 million. In the year before, it made $219,500 on a turnover of $7.1 million. Huh?!!

Read it here.

Crumbs Bakery Peanut Butter Cup Cupcake.....hmm....looks good.
Reason given is the rising overhead cost due to their expansion. So, is it worth it to have your brand name/branch everywhere? Sometimes, maybe it is not. It is difficult to maintain standards in mass production (Trust me, I'm a factory worker).

Chocolate Chip Cupcake with Peanut Butter Frosting from the Coffee Beans & Tea Leaf cafe. Yummy too. The cupcake is dense like soft cookies.

Maybe good things really should come in small packages :-)

Everyone is beautiful but are we grateful?

Something that touched me deep happened tonight.

So many things were going through my mind as I walked to a shopping mall on the way home from work. I thought of that someone and how things went bad between us (my fault). I thought of my wishes. Troubles at work. Things that I read today.....etc....etc.

When I was walking around near a beauty section, I saw a married couple with their kids. 2 older pretty girls and 1 baby in a colourful flowery pram.

I walked past the father who was holding the handle of the pram and saw the baby.

What I saw tugged me at the heartstring. The peacefully sleeping baby had no nose and more than just a cleft. The upper side of the mouth was not formed and continue to the area where the nose should have been.

At that moment, I left my troubles in a bubble for awhile. I wanted nothing more than to hold that baby in my arms and whisper "You are beautiful, sweetheart". My eyes started to tear up. Seeing how peaceful the baby was, sleeping in the pram. Not yet knowing what this world could be and what the future would hold.

How ironic that we were at the beauty product section. A wave of shame swept through me. Beauty product sections in shopping malls exist because of our vanity and insecurity about our looks. Yet, who are we to complain that we're ugly when our Creator had given us everything in place?

I glanced at the parents of the baby and saw that despite it all, they were proud to show the world that this special child was theirs and that the child was celebrated in every way.

I walked back to my car, trying to hold back my tears. I didn't want the parents to see me like that. I got in my car, turned on the music with a slow rock song. I thought of the baby, Nikki Sixx's new song Lies of the Beautiful People and of course 'him'. Tears started trickling down my cheeks. Have I been ungrateful?

A car came to park beside mine. It was full of men when I turned my face to look. Maybe a family of father and sons. I bet they already saw me crying. I reversed my car to leave but I think those men were all curious about my teary eyes as they just stood there after getting out of their car.

I drove away with another lesson learned.

The metrosexua​ls are here to stay.... :-)

Blame it on the likes of David Beckham and Cristiano Ronaldo, the star footballers (soccer players) of the world but metrosexuality is here to stay and conquer our men......and I like it....haha!

While waiting for a mechanic to take a look at my car aircond problem earlier last week, I walked to an Optical shop nearby and casually looked at the Coloured contact lenses promo ad outside the door. A young man came out in pristine outfit with a flyer in his hand. All hair in place. Clear skin. Big eyes.

He greeted me, starting to talk about the promotion they were having. I just stood outside listening. After walking in and out the door several times with different flyers, he asked me to come in. Haha. Poor guy. This is why a career in sales and marketing is a doomed road for me.

I walked in, feeling sorry for the young man. Hey, he was nice. No harm there. Inside, there was another young guy with a pair grey contact lenses. As they were both talking, I looked at them. I think it's fair to say that these guys have more hair product on their hair per day than I've ever had in my entire life!

I wasn't interested to get any coloured contact lenses because I don't really like them. They're a bit dry as the water content is normally below 50%. However, the guys were just doing their jobs. Besides, I have naturally brown eyes which people always mistake for coloured contact lenses anyway.

Before long, I changed the boys' promo talk to another topic. About car maintenance and vacations in Port Dickson (PD). They told me how they enjoy beaches and privacy during holidays. They gushed about Eagle Ranch Resort in PD. Incidentally, it is a place I've been wanting to go. I have a thing for Cowboys and Indians since I was a kid and this place seems like the kind for me. We also talked about the mystical Pulau Besar and our wishes to go there only hindered by the scary stories about it. It was fun sometimes having friendly conversation with total strangers....hehe.

The whole time, it was impossible not to observe the boys' haircuts, their skin, their overall grooming and their demeanor. Yes, they even had nice teeth. Like I said, these guys probably put on more hair products on their head in one day than I've ever had in my entire life. The skin showed that they took the time to choose what skincare would work for them. Mind you, this is just a shop in a small town i.e upgraded village. Not in a big metropolitan.

Ok. Patiently taking their time chit-chatting with me, I thought it was only polite for me to try on the coloured lenses. In this case, Circle lenses that make the irises big like Anime characters. Once I had them on, the boys actually really looked at how those lenses looked on me and commented which colours they thought suited me better.

"Oh, don't pick this one. U look too cartoon-like," "This one is better for u," "She looks different, doesn't she?" (asking his friend)
"Would u like to try this colour? It will look good. Trust me," "Hey, look. Your natural eye colour makes this lense look different," "U see that? How the colour looks on her?" (asking his friend) "Oh, certainly pick this one. It looks so good on U (smile),"
etc.....etc....etc......

Hey, who needs a girl companion to shop with when we can have this kind of male shop assistants?

So, what's a girl to do? Yup, I was so taken in by the charms of the metrosexuals. I came in not wanting anything to do with coloured contact lenses and by the end of the conversation, I willingly forked out RM60 for a pair of Brown Circle Lenses which I do not really need yet those metros liked on me. I don't even know when I'm going to wear them.


To add cherry to the topping, as I sat at the car workshop waiting for the mechanic to work on my car, Mr. Metro No.1 whizzed by in his little car, honking and smiling with a friendly gesture.

I don't know about you but I like men to be accessible, unashamed of being in touch with their inner effeminacy and yet still secure about their sexuality. I certainly am not turned on by men who think they should keep their manliness in check all the time by acting serious and tough or the way we call it in this country = "control macho". Cute and playful are way more fun to me.

Lord of the Rings. Aragorn or Legolas?

the strong and serious Aragorn......?

OR

the agile and playful Legolas?

You know MY answer :-)

The little adoration continued today.....awww....sweet

Following what happened on Friday night with that little girl in my previous post, I'm happy to report that I got another sweet surprise today from a little boy.....awww.

I was walking around looking at all these beauty products randomly at Watsons in Jusco shopping mall today. I had to attend the wedding of a colleague earlier. It was hot and I came to the mall to cool down in the airconditioning in the building.

I was standing at the shampoo section when I saw this little boy on a pushchair wheeled by his father. The boy looked about 1yr++ and still couldn't form a proper word. He had curly brownish hair. He looked up and his eyes stared straight at my face. For awhile, I thought he was puzzled or scared. Well, I couldn't read his expression.

Then, the little boy broke into a smile showing his tiny teeth. I smiled back at him as his father pushed his chair to the end of the rack behind me. The boy leaned over to look at me and started waving his little hand with his baby voice uttering what must have been a baby's "Hi!". I waved back at him and his enthusiasm was just oh-so-endearing. His father just smiled, amused.

Well, that certainly made my day. I hope God will keep on sending me little sweet surprises day after day. Thank you for your gift.

:-)

It feels good to be adored......again

I just went through something I'm not proud of recently.....about 3 weeks ago regarding a person. Don't want to go into that in this post.

So, maybe God had somehow arranged the Universe to perk me up last night and it feels goooooood!!

I was driving home from work when I had to stop at a traffic light when a saloon car carrying a family with young kids stopped on my right. There was a curly-haired little girl sitting on her mother's lap at the front seat. She looked like less than 2yrs old. She turned her cute little face and saw me. Something must have triggered her in the head when she suddenly stood up, smiled showing her tiny teeth and waved at me. I was taken aback. Wow, it'd been such a long time since a stranger's baby did that to me. I got quite a number of this kind of experiences when I was a student but as a working girl? This must be the first in years that I could remember.

Somehow the traffic light took quite some time to change to green, so the little girl was more than happy to be "friendly" towards me. She kept smiling and waving that even her mom and her older brother (about 7yrs old) noticed me too.

When the traffic light turned green, her dad sped the car away. It was a much bigger car than my "trusty rusty antique" so I was left behind in the trails. However, the car sped away with the cute little girl smiling even bigger and waving at me even stronger. Now that's the memory that is etched in my mind as I'm typing this.

Yes, it feels good to be adored like that especially if it's from a little soul. Random act of adoration. It's a baby. No agenda. Just pure adoration. Thank you God for this little gift :-)

Beastly the Movie and my stream of thoughts.......

I went to watch the movie Beastly not too long ago.

I haven't read the teen book this movie was adapted from. So, my opinions here are solely based on the movie. The following are the thoughts that streamed through my mind as I watched it:

1. The scripwriter tried too hard to make the lead character Kyle the most conceited looks-obsessed guy that actor Alex Pettyfer ended up having to keep a straight face while saying some of the downright corniest lines ever uttered by a movie character I have ever heard in my life!

2. Mary Kate Olsen alien-meets-bag-lady fashion sense actually works very well in the movie. She was the coolest-looking person in there. From the Witch Cloak to the Madhatter to the Goth Mary Quant to the White Goddess, she visually stole the screen from Alex Pettyfer.

3. Neil Patrick Harris managed to provide the comic relief with the very little material they had given him.


4. The storytelling needs to learn a lot from Disney's animated Beauty and the Beast. The script came across as choppy and the "falling in love" build-up felt a bit "cut & paste". I felt that the roles of Kyle's unofficial "cheerleaders" i.e his helper Lisa Gay Hamilton and his tutor Neil Patrick Harris could have been widened more to heighten the "will they fall in love" anticipation factor. Both actors gave great performance despite the minimal time though.

Ok. They could even learn from the High School Musical I movie. Despite its cheesiness, HSM I is a very well-written story which I enjoy immensely. The drama, build-up and climax all in the right pacing. Beastly suffers from choppy pacing.

5. I felt no connection at all to the "Beauty" in Beastly. The movie gives very minimal insight of who or what she is as a person. This "Beauty" just does not have the warmth that Disney's Belle gives you very early in the story. It could also be that Vanessa Hudgens' acting is pretty much flat that the whole "kindness-and-heart-of-gold" thing just wasn't convincing to watch.

Ms. Hudgens has the Jennifer Aniston syndrome. She plays Gabriella Montez (High School Musical) over and over again just like Jen plays Rachel (Friends) over and over again. Very limited acting range.

6. Kyle a.k.a Hunter "beastly" look certainly isn't beastly in New York City! In fact, it can actually be really cool. I thought, 'Freak Show....Coney Island'......hmm

7. Oh my God, Alex Pettyfer is the upgraded and updated version of Nick Carter (BSB) in British form!

2011 now and Good Riddance!

Can't believe I've been away from this blog this long. Typical me. Call it the fluctuation of passion. When the passion is high, I'd make a resolution to post everyday. When the passion runs a bit low, I'd do it weekly. Then, it can be down to monthly but this has been my all-time low with a lapse of a few months.

My 2011 didn't start off well. First of all, I was down with bad fever. Then, the problem at work with my newest subordinate came to its breaking point. The guy left the company and I am utterly relieved.

With this blog starting and quickly turning into my channel to vent out, I think it's time for me to tell my story from the last 3 months that I am so happy to have an ending for. I have mentioned it before that I had this young guy in my Section whom we hired to train to be a Radiation worker, replacing the girl who resigned before.

This guy couldn't speak very well during the interview. But I just figured maybe it's because we had required for them to speak English. I saw the warning sign when I looked at his Application Form and saw that he spelled the word English as Inglish. What the heck? How can you make mistakes like that? An average public schooled person in Malaysia would start learning ENGLISH at age 7 up to age 17. It has always been spelled with an E not an I. So, how did this guy manage to mess that up? That should've been the major red flag based on which, I should have rejected him.

At the same time, I was so desperate to fill in the job vacancy to answer to the SONY people when they found our Section had problem catching up with our workload due to manpower shortage. So, we had to take him as the other interviewers already picked the other candidates. I was left with only this guy. So, he came in and I became an "officephobic" within a week. Sunday night gave me the worst anxiety because I knew I had to face this person and Heaven knew what things he'd do to send me to my boiling point.


These are my reasons for wanting to shout all across the universe with a cosmic megaphone......GOOD RIDDANCE!!!

1.  He was quiet, quiet, quiet. Once, the rest of the team were busy attending to the people from SONY and he was left on his own in front of the PC. He didn't say a word to anyone, not even to the boy who came and sat next to him to use the other PC. For the WHOLE day! Not a single word.

2.  He talked to a total of only THREE people by his own will. One was his former collegemate, one was a fellow interviewee and another was his cousin. That was IT. He talked to me simply because he HAD TO. The only times he'd speak to other people was when I told him to. I even had to tell him what to say and what question to ask to those other people.

3.  He would inform me every time he finished an assignment and then ask what else he was supposed to do. Then he'd stand there waiting for me to give next instruction after another. He'd do this 3 to 4 times a day!

* I can't accept this from any Technician and above. That is OK for the low level employees like the Operators or the Inspectors. Not a Technician! A Technician should have been able to think and analyze at least within his own job scope. If not, you should have been relegated to the lower position and lower salary. A Technician should have asked questions in "Why's" and "How's" and NOT "What's". Certainly NOT in the veins of "What am I supposed to do?" nor "What do I do now?" every day.

4.  He would isolate himself at break times. He'd sit either by himself or with any of those THREE people he knew (Refer No.2) instead of hanging out and socializing with any of our Division member. Let alone our Section member!

5.  He would arrive late on average twice a week. It was normal for him to miss one or both morning meetings every week. This drove me mad because I hold the meetings only TWO times a week so as not to give stress to my subordinates. Daily meetings are useless anyway. Other sections still do it daily. Why couldn't he commit to only TWO mornings per 5-day week?

6.  He jumbled up the XRF parts control system terminology I had painstakingly established with my former boss and colleague several years ago for his own convenience. We had written a manual (which he never tried to read), made visual displays and even roped in the IT members to set up a special Menu for this activity in the MRP system to ensure things were done right. I even carried a one-to-one training for every new member on this. How DARE he changed things around?

7.  I once asked his help to correct the wrong markings I mistakenly did to a drawing. Let me repeat that.....a drawing. Yes, that's ONE drawing! I had specifically pulled out the drawing and showed what corrections to do and where. Moments later, he came to me and asked, "Err...which drawing is it?" I felt like rolling that drawing tight and hit his head with it like a stick.

Could things get any worse? Oh, yes it could!

Here's No.8...............


8.  He didn't like to wear deodorant.


So, how bad did he make me want to resign from my post and flee? So bad that I had actually browsed for jobs in Japan!

My car is back from the workshop with a new life.......and God knows how long would it be

Yup. I got my car back after a long hiatus. It went to the mechanic for a month to have the engine replaced. With a car produced in 1992, there is no way we can get a truly "new" engine. It's a used engine from God knows what year just to enable my car to move. My father is already telling me he saw some oil leaking on the garage floor after my car repair. I think it could be the Gear oil. Oh, the exhaust has been emitting smoke again barely 2 days after the engine replacement.

Well, I guess the "stingy" genes do run in my family...ha..ha! My friends at the office have been nagging me to buy a new one. In fact, I, myself declared on this blog a year ago that I would be getting one by the end of LAST year. Well, it's been a year after and I still am taking my rides on a "rusting piece of steel" I call MY car. Everyone is puzzled over my attachment to my car.

Ok. In tandem with my "stinginess", I am contemplating whether to get the cheapest car in Malaysia right now which is a Viva 660 which is a petrol super saver OR just upgrade considerably to its 1.0 Automatic sister. The 660 Model has no power steering, no power windows, no hand grips at the back seat and no stereo system. I don't really give a toss about "accessories" like reverse sensor or alarm. My trusty (rhymes with rusty....xD) old car has no such things. However, I DO need power steering, power windows (front seat), hand grips (all seats) and stereo system. If I do get this "sardine can" Viva 660, I will have to spend a bit to have these installed.

Well, it's not really those extras that bother me. They can be done. It's the being tied with another hire-purchase loan that bothers me. It's no fun getting into your 40s still having to pay for your ride.

Well, life's like that.

Mad about Ben Barnes....it's the Chronicles of Narnia Voyage of the Dawn Treader!

Went to watch the new Narnia movie last night after work......because I fell in love with Ben Barnes from the last Prince Caspian Narnia installment :-)

Not going to really make a review about the movie here. I just want to talk about the people in it....mmmm ;-)

The trailer. Oh, little Lucy has blossomed!

Blossoming into a young woman brings insecurity to Lucy this time.

Wishing she looks like her sister Susan.
I wish Lucy was a few years older in this movie actually. Read on to know why.

Hmm......I think actress Georgie Henley has grown into a very pretty young woman. Oh, just look at how they styled her hair. Beautiful. Now I wish mine could look like that!

I always have a thing for long-haired pretty boys.

Thanks to growing up in the 80s :-)

Hey, I DID say that I went to watch Ben Barnes primarily. Yup! I'm very satisfied with what I'd seen.

Oh, he looks good from any angle.
Caspian greeting Edmund.

I wish CS Lewis paired Lucy up with Caspian instead.

Throughout the movie, I wish Lucy was older. Older enough to be paired with Caspian. Personality-wise, she was the one who would be good for him in the long run. I know that's not how the book is but the thought just crossed my mind when Lucy coyly asked Caspian "had he found his Queen?"

In real life, however, it would be like pairing brother and sister if Lucy and Caspian got together.
This is a shot of Ben and Georgie during a movie break in Prince Caspian. Aww!

What's a movie nowadays without some comic sidekicks?

Btw, I think Eustace stole the show in this movie.

Now this is what ruined my Ben Barnes moment in the movie........and the reason why I wish Lucy was older.

Why the HECK would they make a Paris-Hilton lookalike as Caspian's potential love interest? Duh!
Please at least change her makeup.

Grrr.........those movie people! You guys spoiled my "out-to-see-Ben" night!

My first Vegan Vanilla Cupcakes

I did it! I did my first Vegan baking on Friday night. It's Vanilla Soymilk Cupcakes. Totally vegan. Not that I'm a vegan but I've always been curious about vegan cakes. How good could they get without the eggs?

Here is the recipe I did.

Vegan Vanilla Cupcakes

Ingredients:

1 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp baking soda
1/2 cup soymilk (I actually used sweetened commercial soymilk in a bottle)
1/2 tbs sugar cane vinegar (you may use any type of clear vinegar I think)
1/4 cup vegetable oil (all I had was cheap palm cooking oil)
1 tsp vanilla extract

Method

1. Mix together the dry ingredients in a bowl. I like to use a whisk here.
2. Pour the vinegar into the soymilk, stir a little to mix it and let it curdle.
3. Pour the oil into the soymilk mixture and stir well.
4. While still stirring the soymilk/oil mixture, pour it into the dry mixture.
5. Carefully mix it all together till there is no lump.
(I am scared of over-mixing because of previous gluten disaster cake batter)
6. Fill up your cupcake liners of choice.
7. Bake in a pre-heated oven at 180 deg C or 340 deg F for about 15 mins.

I managed to yield 9 cupcakes on a Standard-size Cupcake liners. About 3 1/4 oz size.

The texture is pretty fluffy for an eggless cuppie.
It will never be a sponge cake but not as dense and heavy as I expected it to be.

How did it turn out?

1. The milk thing

I think the kind of milk you use will affect how this cupcake will taste. My cupcake tasted like soymilk. I know some vegans avoid any soy which I will never understand why. It's one of my favourite drinks since I was a kid along with chrysanthemum tea, sugar cane juice, lychee, grass jelly. I haven't yet tasted almond milk or rice milk but I'm sure what those taste would greatly define the final cupcakes if you want to eat unfrosted.

2. Light sweet tooth

There is something that feels really light about this. There is no rich taste of the normal recipe with eggs and cow's milk. The egg and dairy cakes are rich and delicious but to an average person, after 2 or 3 cupcakes, you have to stop. It gets too much. With this vegan cupcake, I found myself easily putting 4 cupcakes into my mouth and not feeling this was too much. They were like sweet bread to my tongue. Meaning it will be much easier to pair this cupcake with any frosting you want.

3. Texture and all

What happened when I tried to peel off the cupcake liner right after baking.
The cake got peeled off too. Ha..ha!

Look at the cake ending up on the liner!
The cake is moist. Very moist. The oil and soymilk must have done it good :-)

4. Better after they cooled down in a few hours or the next day.

This is the cupcake the day after.
The cake did not come off like it did when peeled off hot.

The inner texture. Better than some of my non-vegan cupcakes.

I think I have made something non-vegan similar to this .
If I can achieve the same result minus the eggs, then I think I would rather go for the Vegan version. More convenient and less calories.


It looked and tasted better the next day. Soft and moist.

5. Why vegan baking appeals to me?

Eggs are tricky to keep fresh if you don't have a fridge. I would rather fill up my mini fridge with fruits. Butter is too expensive and also take up space in the fridge but we have plenty of cooking oil in stock everyday. I haven't yet tried things like Canola Oil and the likes but other than Peanut Oil , I think most oils are pretty much tasteless.

6. Would I make them again?

YES! Definitely.

What? No posts for October?!

I can't believe I didn't post anything in October. I'm not proud of this, you know. It means I couldn't even pull myself away from getting too immersed in my busy October schedule for my personal life. I'm guilty of not replying yet to my friend's email. I owe her that.

So, what happened in my life back in October?

1. I went through a series of Audits and Customer meetings. Had a "verbal tension" with this lady from Purchasing. Actually, I do like her but sometimes, when it comes to work, she treats me like I should be chanelling all of my time and resources for HER agenda. When she didn't get what she wants there and then, she would start rattling off words which boil my temper hot. Hey, I can't just split myself into 4 lady!!

2. I got a new boy in my Section. A cute boy and he drives me nuts. No, not that! Ha...ha...! It's just that he's got what I call "the today's generation's syndrome". Meaning, today's kids are pretty spineless expecting things to be served to them on a silver platter. These kids live in an age of the Internet and cellphones. Nobody left schools nowadays without knowing how to use the computer. These kids want things easy and crumble easily at any hint of hardship. So, what's my gripe on my newest boy? Well, he's polite. They all are. However, he drives me insane when he feels the need to come to me EVERY time. Oh, another big gripe of mine about kids nowadays is they have UGLY handwriting and this boy is no exception. I hope by the end of the year, he will be more and more independent. I probably can't do anything about the handwriting though.

3. It's hard not to want to shout profanities at work to some nincompoops in the Administration for making our lives super difficult.

4. For the umpteenth time, I wish the Alien would just DIE! Anyone who knows my blog for quite some time would know who the Alien is. There is an Alien parading around in our company HR as a human. That creature is the most INHUMAN being I've ever known. This is what happened. I got my latest Payslip and saw that they cut out TWO HOURS of payment for my two overtimed Saturdays. As it turned out, the Alien had instructed (this is not written anywhere in the company rules) that any employees in my salary threshold will lose ONE WHOLE HOUR of payment if we scan in our employee card at even ONE MINUTE over 8.00am!!!! Crazy!!! The thing is we only get paid MYR6.25 per hour which is less than USD2! This is insane! Guess what? I have a new wish for the A*****e. I hope he dies of some anal disease or something.

My company's recent 21st Anniversary Buttercream Sponge Cake.
I burned my fingers accidentally while lighting the candles.

5. I finally got through the company's Annual Celebration. I was forced to work alongside the Alien closely yet again this year for it. What a nightmare! The only good thing I got this year is the fact that my friends took some great quality photos of me. I actually looked good without the metallic weird makeup they put on me last year. I made my own face and I looked like myself and that's the way I like it.

Some people just pride themselves on being A***holes

Sometimes I wonder whether our Creator created some people specifically to be a**holes to the rest of us to "test" us or to "balance" the otherwise extremely peaceful and easygoing normal us.

Has it ever puzzled you why some people just do whatever it takes to make other people's lives hell?

Makes me wonder too every time, just what is wrong with being nice and understanding?

I am having a hard time at work at the moment. As one member is resigning soon, I am in the process of arranging another remaining member to help take over her workload. So, I already got the Clerk to issue an application to put this guy to 12-hour shift next week.

When the Clerk made an enquiry to the HR office about this, the snotty motormouth HR Assistant Manager that nobody likes, challenged my request by saying, "Can't you just train him in normal hours?!" over and over. Look, I don't know how his "logic" works but I am essentially making ONE person do the jobs of TWO people. That's why those extra hours for my subordinate are crucial to my Section. This workload that I am in the process of transferring to this boy is exactly the area that our Customer SONY Japan is going to look into next month!!!! I can't risk letting those people scrutinize our work to find "incomplete reports" and jumbled up "monitoring lists" or even "missing inspection parts" simply because the new boy has not been given enough time to totally understand and do the job properly while proceeding with his daily job of inspecting the new samples for Customer Approval.

As usual, I answered back with the argument I brought up for few years already to the HR people every time they argued that my Division is nothing more than a "supporting Division" or in their actual term "the non-money-making Division". I told him that the Management should have been aware that my Section being at the helm of Part Approval is actually doing one of the Cores of TS16949 Five Core Pillars. So, how on earth is the Management still looking at us as a "supporting" Group simply because our Division is NOT producing any products? If the
Management don't understand the principles of our Quality System, then they shouldn't have pushed us to achieve it in the first place. Stupid people! I challenged him back to send me face to face with the Top Management people to explain this matter and that was when he said something like we are "little people" and nobody would listen to us.

Why am I always getting blocked every time I challenge someone of superior to send me direct to the highest Management? I'm not afraid of speaking up. For me, they're the ones who don't have the balls to stand up for what is right.

Oh, by the way, everyone is my Section is essentially doing TWO-person jobs each now. Even my own Manager has not even asked me about our manpower situation. Such is his concern for this Division*sarcasm*. Here we are, a group of overworked and underpaid people who actually are concerned about performing our duties right and proper for our company and yet there are people who question it and are totally clueless on what good management is all about.

Trying to tell myself that "Life Is Beautiful"........

Yeah people.

I'm trying to tell myself that "Life Is Beautiful". Those familiar with my rantings here would probably be able to smell that every time I write something like that, it means I'm being sarcastic. At myself. At life.

Things are not going well at work. Back before July, I blew the roof with my management when they tried to get me demoted. They wanted to split my Section by promoting my colleague to the same position as me meaning I would no longer be his Section Leader. The Management was trying to kick me out of my own Section. Another thing that angered me was their reasoning that it had been a long time since my colleague was last promoted. Excuse me?!!!! His last promotion was in 2006 and my last promotion was in 2005. Were they trying to throw it right at my face that to their eyes, my work isn't up to par to be given any acknowledgment?

I have slaved myself for the past 10 years, representing my management who always went AWOL every time there was an Audit or when some direct Customers coming over for new projects, being stationed away at our Suppliers' premises for Quality matters as the only woman working to wee hours alongside men, extra hours that I gave to the company (unpaid!), working my asses off coming up with new ideas bringing improvement to our Division, dedicating myself to giving education & training to new members to bring out th best in them for our Division and standing up for my colleagues when other people tried to stomp all over them.

In the end, I'm being paid back by getting demoted. Nowadays, my heart is not there anymore. Apart from my Section, I don't care about anything at my workplace anymore.

Below are several more reasons why I keep telling myself that "Life Is Beautiful" just to keep me consoled and positive (hope is a good thing):

1. One of my subordinates is leaving soon. She'll be no more with us starting October. I wish her well because this company holds no future for her.

2. My Section will be reduced to only FOUR people and the Management still hasn't found us the replacement manpower I requested months ago. Not to mention having stolen my Clerk from right under my nose.

3. My car oil is leaking badly and the exhaust has been emitting terrible smoke for weeks now. I'm torn whether to pool my money to overhaul the old engine or to put as downpayment for a new (but far less equipped and accessorized) compact car. I hate having to commit myself to car payment again but at the same time I feel now is the time to get a new car since before the interest rate goes further up.

4. There will be a Green Procurement Audit by SONY Japan in October and my soon-to-resign subordinate is the key person for that particular area that those SONY people want to scrutinize. *sigh*Why oh why must she leave at this time?

5. My car Stereo has "blown up". At first I had my Mp3 Player but suddenly it stopped working yesterday. exactly one year after I started using it. I saw its tiny LED screen bleeping while I was charging it yesterday and then "blank". The horrible thing is I have no backup over the songlist I put in it. So, I may have to put up with at least ONE WEEK of silence in my daily drive to and from work since I have no time to look for replacement during weekdays.


I feel empty each and everyday. So, in order to keep my sanity intact for the following week, this will be my reigning life soundtrack. Though Mr. Sixx wrote it about his heroin addiction, however, just like he did, I feel like my life is being taken away from me with each passing moment. Thanks Nikki.....for this.

Sixx A.M - Life Is Beautiful

"Life Is Beautiful"

You can't quit until you try
You can't live until you die
You can't learn to tell the truth
Until you learn to lie

You can't breathe until you choke
You gotta laugh when you're the joke
There's nothing like a funeral to make you feel alive

Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?

I know some things that you don't
I've done things that you won't
There's nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home

I was waiting for my hearse
What came next was so much worse
It took a funeral to make me feel alive

Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?

Alive...
Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?

Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?

Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?

My Rock n Roll books arrived....yeah!

Look what was waiting for me when I arrived home from work yesterday.

My rock 'n roll books order from Amazon! Hurray!!!

Been wishing for these since May. I talked about it here.

Ordering from Amazon may cost a bit more in terms of shipping but they always arrive safely within 2 weeks.

Ok. I just lamented on the fact that middle of every year always seems to make me broke yet I willingly ordered these books from the US. I couldn't resist the lure of the dropping US dollar currency against our Ringgit. After keeping these books in my Amazon Wish List for awhile, the exchange rate finally dropped to below RM3.20 for USD1. It was more than 3.4 at one time. Sadly, Bobby Blotzer's book went out of print the minute the rate dropped to 3.15. Holy cow! So, I ordered them at 3.17. It was agony having to wait for Bobby's book to be in stock again while watching the exchange rate go up point by point.

Bobby Blotzer's Tales of a Ratt, Stacey Blades' Snake Eyes and Nikki Sixx's Heroin Diaries. Motley Crue's The Dirt was bought on a whim though xD

Leafed through each and for a moment I was overwhelmed by me eagerness to pick to read first. After some thoughts, I decided to read them in the following order:

No. 1
Stacey Blades' Snake Eyes: Confessions of a Replacement Rock Star
The lightest in volume and the largest font that even I can read at one-arm length. Sadly, the pictures are not in colours like the sneak peak version on Amazon.

No. 2
Bobby Blotzer's Tales of a Ratt
This one has the easiest on the eyes and cleanest font and layout to me.

No. 3
Motley Crue's The Dirt
A thick book but oh dear, the font is tiny. It feels like holding Tolstoy's War and Peace in my hand.

No. 4
Nikki Sixx's The Heroin Diaries
I did say that I wanted to see how the layout and artwork used to present this book visualize the heroin addiction story. Oh, my words can be such a prophecy. If that is really their intention, then they have successfully done it. I got dizzy just by leafing through this book. I had to put the book away because I knew I would start to feel nauseous if I didn't. The colours and the graphic made my head swirl. Is this what heroin can do to you? So, I'm going to read this last.

I don't know how long will these take me given my crazy working hours. I mean, I just finished Mitch Albom's Tuesdays With Morrie after about 4 months or so.

I'm a romantic but the Twilight saga just isn't IT to me

Went to see the 3rd installment of the Twilight saga last month. Eclipse. What I'm going to say next may make millions of teenage girls angry.

Ok. First of all, I did enjoy the first movie tremendously as it was beautifully shot and there was a good balance of teen angst, mystery, action and high school girl-meets-boy thing amidst the excellent cinematography. At my age, of course I knew almost nil about what's hot in teen girls' literary world. Yes, I'm one of those people who discovered this through the movie.

So, out of curiosity, I went and purchased the book to see how the written work was translated to the big screen. Got all FOUR books and...........I wish I hadn't. I have seen countless debates online from both parties who criticise the books and the die-hard fans who defend
them vehemently. After finishing, I must say that I'm in the critic group.

I will always tell people that I'm a romantic at heart and being that, there's where I found the problem with the books; Edward and Bella's relationship just ISN'T love to me. The "love" described in the book feels more like and OBSESSION of a teenage girl with a member of a boyband. Why am I saying this? Just read the first book and see how Bella describes Edward every chance she gets. How "perfectly muscled" he is, "beautiful hair", "male model features", perfect skin etc etc. So much so that I don't even know what is the characteristic of Edward as a
person that she falls in love with. Even actor Robert Pattinson said in an interview that Bella is "obsessed" with Edward. See? Straight from the mouth of the guy who should know.

So, why are the movies bearable to me? It's because it was obvious from the first big screen installment that the two lead actors are not keen on playing the characters the way they were written in the books. They both wanted to interpret it their way. Kristen Stewart didn't want to
portray Bella as weak. Yes, the Bella in the book is so meek and clingy plus sex-crazy. If one just watch Kristen's potrayal without reading the book, one wouldn't have guessed how weak Bella is in the original story. Robert never made it a secret how, back in school, he hated guys who behave like they are the hottest handsome men around.

Back to the movies, I have to admit that it becomes more and more cringe-inducing with each subsequent installment. That scene of Edward and Bella running in the woods is a celebration of romance galoria Bollywood style xD. My sister and I burst into laughter the moment THAT
came on screen. By the 3rd movie, you see more and more scenes of the two lovebirds on beds of flowers. Just one step away from Bella and Edward suddenly bursting into different multi-coloured clothes and prancing around the trees xD

On a side note, I am still puzzled as to how many young women who had watched Harry Potter 4 movie did not notice Robert Pattinson as Cedric Diggory. How can you not notice the actor who played Cedric? Isn't Cedric described as the popular gorgeous guy in the book? The guy who won the heart of Harry's first love, Cho Chang? What did you imagine? When I first saw Robert in Harry Potter, my reaction was like, "Woh! That is far beyond my expectation for Cedric." Anyway, his looks aside, the young man actually has talent and depth.

Back to the Twilight saga, anyone with a sane mind would find that the most likeable character is Jacob. In fact, it is Jacob who challenges Bella to say what is it about Edward that she loves so much? That is well into the story as in........ Book No.3? Maybe Ms. Meyer wrote Jacob to be the "common sense" to this Bella-Edward's notion of "romance". In fact, had it not been for Ms. Meyer's decision to let us delve into Jacob's mind by writing certain chapters in Jacob's first-person's view, I might have gone straight to the last chapter of Breaking Dawn just to end the story. I have to agree with some critics' opinion that turning the gentle Jacob into this guy who forces himself on Bella from time to time seems designed to make us readers dislike him in favour of Edward. He's a wolf now. Hence, his beastly tendency. How convenient.

There are some issues that other critics found problems with but I don't. Feminists tend to blast Bella's home-maker side as she prepares dinner for her father and always making sure both her parents are well taken care of. In fact, that detail of how Bella takes good care of her family is the admirable thing about her before she turns into this spineless clingy damsel in distress as the story progresses. Bella is independent in Book No.1 and she doesn't need anyone to cling to initially till she meets Edward of course. Some people have problems with Edward's over-protective nature over Bella as controlling. I don't have problems with that as Ms. Meyer makes it clear that Edward has old-fashioned values, coming from a century-old era. The problem is I don't feel what they have between them as "love". I was a teenager once and I have had my fair share of teen romance books. Twilight just doesn't make me shiver or send that tingling down my spine. I wanted the books to have that effect on me but to the end, not even a low vibration. Let along tingling down my spine. Forget throbbing in the groin xD

However, I will continue watching the movies at the cinema to see how the next installment shall translate to the big screen. Besides, I have always liked Kristen Stewart since the first time I saw her playing Jodie Foster's daughter in The Panic Room years ago. Any young girl who could hold her own opposite a powerhouse actress like Ms. Foster deserves respect. As for Mr. Pattinson, I'm glad he has found this fame and money quite early in his career as this means he can now afford to choose any project that can suit his range as an actor, which I think is very wide. Again, how could people not see the star in Robert Pattinson during Harry Potter? Now suddenly, he's this major heartthrob. How fickle young girls can be. I'd say to Mr. Pattinson and Ms. Stewart,
"milk as much out of the cow now while you still can".

Lastly, I stand by my opinion that if I had a daughter, I wouldn't recommend her to read Twilight at all.